Thoughts of China...

I know that the next few days will be a whirlwind, so I have decided to blog some of my thoughts today. The first thought that I have is of our baby Killian. This will be our 5th Christmas without him. Logan asked me about him yesterday and was asking why a baby would die. Logan is really understanding death at this time, since his Grandpa recently died, but struggled with his younger brother's death, because this does not make sense... yes I understand that too, but his is our path in this life. And although I would trade any lessons I have learned, to be my shallow self before his death, I can't deny that my life has changed since loosing him. I am grateful for my healthy and happy boys. I appreciate family more, and have to believe that we are adopting a daughter now because Killian knows this will heal us. Killian is always with us... I can feel him and see his signs from time to time. And our baby in China... so many unanswered questions. Is she born, where was she abandoned, is she loved this Christmas, is she warm, is she being held, is her belly full??? All these questions that we don't know the answers to.. we can only hope that we will be holding her soon.

Revving up for Christmas!

Well the Vogel house is revving up for Christmas. We went to see the man in red yesterday. That was fun. Of course when they saw Santa, they completely changed their list... ugh! The picture below is of them waiting in line. I wasn't allowed to take a picture of them with Santa, unless I wanted to pay for it, and we said no thanks. I think that if I tried the lady would have tackled me to the ground and taken my camera. As it was I had to walk through to the exit while they talked to Santa. The bear in the picture is Winston. Winston travels through Logan's class and then the kids have to write about their adventures with him. It was very exciting to take Winston to the mall with us!!

There were 2 really great things that happened at the mall though. The first is that Logan reminded Santa not to come down the chimney because he will be burnt by the wood burner. The second awesome thing is that Jacob gave some of his money to the bell ringer. This is a big step for Jacob, because he is somewhat of a miser. It was really cool to see him donate his money, independently. They are both such sweet boys and we are really blessed.

We also made cut out cookies. Well at least the first batch, because they have both eaten 5 each today alone and the cookies will never make it to Christmas. They have a sweet tooth, like their mom!

We will update again to tell everyone how Christmas turned out :)